Alexander the Great
December 04, 2004, 1:20 p.m.

Last night was... wonderful-- to an extent. Indeed, it wasn't as great as last Saturday, but I hardly think one can top last week--

Except, of course, losing ones virginity. But that's not coming for a long while. Too bad.

Just kidding.

Last night, I got my music theory homework done, and about half of my pre-cal stuff done at Pioneer's house while he showered and got dressed. Then after doing what teenagers do for fifteen minutes or so, I asked him to tap for me, so he turned on the radio, put on his tap shoes and went through all of the rudiments, showin' off his wonderful tap skills. He's such a good tap dancer. And sexy, too.

Oh, I feel like such a groupie:

"Hey, sexy man, if you tap for me I'll make it worth your while, if you catch my drift." *wink, wink; nudge, nudge*

Yeah....

His dad then came in to tell is that it was time to head to Pi's saxophone lesson. He's a decent saxophonist, mind you, but a better dancer.

His dad came in after the lesson, screaming, "Are you guys ready to watch the best movie in the world?"

"I thought we were going to see Alexander," whispered I to Pi.

It turns out, though, that it was a pretty good movie. I'm still confused about Alexander's sexuality, though. Many implications were made about him being a homosexual, and he also kissed a guy, though he was being cheered on by his soldiers.

At one point, it seemed that he waved for his servant to climb into bed with him, but it was barely noticable and left the audience wondering what the hell that was.

I also saw his ass and scrotum. Wooh. There's nothing more sexy then a ball sack visible between an actor's legs. Not exactly porn, but then again I don't watch that stuff anyway. I'll leave that to Jimmie. But it makes me wonder how the hell Alexander couldn't conceive with any of his wives with a scrotum like that.

Sheesh.

All-in-all, the movie was pretty good. I'd give it a C. It had many great fighting scenes, and it was occasionally funny, but its plot seemed underdeveloped and forced. Indeed, there were many slow parts in the movie while the plot was being narrated. Plus, it's too goddamn long. 3 hours!

As I climbed into bed last night, I had a thought that caught off guard. It wasn't something I'd expect to be thinking about for a long while, at least until I was in my twenties. I thought to myself as I pulled the covers over my feet and wrapped the canopy around my bed, I wish I could have Pioneer's child.

What the fuck?

Since when do I want children? I've told my mother that I'd never want children, that they're too much of a burden emotionally and financially. And yet somehow that thought came into my consciousness. Naturally, I pushed it donw immediately; that's not a thought that a 17-year-old should be happening. It's not the 1920s. That's not normal.

I think I'm going insane. Dear god, someone shoot me.

Ta-ta.

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