Jimmie!!
July 16, 2004, 5:34 p.m.

For Jimmie.

What Would You do if..?

I cried: You'd never cry in front of me, and you know it. But hypothetically, I'd ask you what's wrong and give you a hug.

I asked you to help: I'd help you, if it was a reasonable request.

I died from natural causes: I'd cry and attend your funeral.

I said I liked you: Hahahahahaha! That's too funny.

I kissed you: HAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA! Even funnier. A gay guy kissing dear old me.

I started smoking: I'd make you stop!

I stole something: I'd reprimand you, but that's about it.

I was hospitalized: I'd come visit you and give you flowers and a get-well card.

I ran away from home: I'd call you an idiot.

I got in a fight and you were there: If you got in a fight, and I was there, it was probably between you and I...

I got pregnant: HAAAAAAHAHAHA.

I got dumped: I'd be your shoulder to cry on.

I pissed you off: We already know how that plays out....

What Do You Think Of My..?

Personality: Wonderfully funny and gay. What more could a gal want?

Eyes: They're disguised by your glasses. When not wearing your glasses, they're rather large. You've got Betty Davis eyes!

Face: Those lips.....'Nough said.

Hair: What hair?

Clothes: You dress in superhero t-shirts. It's cool.

Voice: It sounds like a gay guy's voice. Your fake accents are funny, though.

Humor: "Gays will rule the world!"

Choice of music: You listen to just about anything, don't you?

Manerisms: You're slowly adopting the limp wrist thing.

Family: Homophobic mom, younger sister, older sister.... yeah.

Body: *shrugs* Never looked at it.

Friends: I'm your bestest friend!!

Decisions: Well, it's not like you've made any life-altering ones yet, so...

Would You..?

Be my friend: I'm your best friend, silly.

Tell me the truth no matter what: Uh, no.

Lie to make me feel better: If it was a small lie, yes.

Spread rumors about me: There was that one I jokingly started, that you were bi. But that's only 'cause you grabbed my boob.

Keep a secret if I told you one: I suck at keeping secrets.

Loan me some cash: If I had any.

Hold my hand: Sure, why not?

Take a bullet for me: Uh...

Keep in touch: Of course!

Try and solve my problems: If you'd let me.

Love me: I already do.

Ditch me: Not intentionally.

Use me: Haha, for what?

Date me: Um, no.

Rape me: Yeah!

Beat me up: It'd be a tie.

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