Damn boys
2003-02-26, 9:52 p.m.

My dad is such an asshole. Every time I try to do what I need to do I get punished. If I'd rather finish up my work instead of eat dinner with the rest of the family I'm "neglecting the family" and therefor deserve to be sent to my room.

Speaking of which, that's where I've been for the past three hours. I yelled at him for calling me a liar. He thinks I wasn't doing homework, but chatting. Just chatting. I kind of had to turn on AIM because Sarah, my fifth period buddy, had the homework assignment. And since I missed fifth period today, I had to get it from her. After explaining that to him (my dad), I was told that I was "fabricating". I got pissed.

"For your information, I'm not lying, and you shouldn't call me a liar when you don't know what you're talking about."

"How dare you talk to me this way! I am your father! You've been getting slick with the mouth lately. You may be 14--"

"I'm 15."

"Shut up. You may be 15, but I can still beat your ass."

"Whatever," I mumbled.

"Whatever?! Get off the computer! Now!" At this point I'm trying to shut everything down, telling Matt and the others (who I was occasionally talking to). "I said now! Get your ass off that computer! You still sitting down? Get off that computer and bring your ass to the table."

"I'm not eating!"

"Then go to your room!"

"Fine!" I stormed out of the room. Again I mumbled. "Asshole."

So right. I think I've realized why I seem to shy away from relationships. Hell, I just figured out that I do shy away from relationships. And you know what? That's a shame.

The last relationship I had was when I was 13. Obviously, I was still really darn young (not saying I'm not now or anything) and inexperienced. Still am, in fact, to a certain extent.

One of the reasons why I avoid relationships is because I'm so inexperienced. Everyone expects so much more from a girl nowadays. Even from freshmens.

Take Drew, for example. Bad example, I know, but listen. Drew's done far more than what I've dreamed of doing at 14. (BTW, his birthday was Monday. He's finally 15) Sure, he hasn't had sex yet, but he's come pretty close. Hell, for that reason I probably wouldn't go out with him, even though I want to.

Maybe I'll just convince Tad to go out with me. He's never had a girlfriend, you know. Perfect. He'd expect nothing from me.

Damn boys.

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