Wah!
June 02, 2003, 12:02 a.m.

It's 12:02 and I'm finally updating. The whole day (apart from dress shopping) was spent doing homework. Most of it was English. Ok, all of it was English. We, the class, had to read three chapters of Lord of the Flies and do 30 vocab words with definitions and synonyms, so yeah.

Apart from that I went dress shopping for the band/orchestra banquet on the 7th. While searching for the dress, I became quite self-conscious and managed to become depressed.

I now wear a size two. Two! After losing the weight, I'd dropped down three sizes to fit a two. Do you know how freakin' hard it is to find a dress in my size? Suddenly I felt too skinny and sick-like and odd. Makes me wonder why people celebrate those at my size. Those dresses that did fit didn't look right on me at all because they're made for someone with larger breasts.

In case you've never seen me, I have absolutely, positively no chest. Pair that with a lack of ass and you've got one white-looking black chick. Yeah.

I need boob implants.

Harry's mad at me again. After admitting his feelings for his crush, he claims that the person is avouding him. He proved his point more when he IMd the person today and no response was given. I IMd the same person (mutual friends) and got a quick reply.

I know it's not my fault, but I can't help to feel guilty about it. Harry's proved his point. He hates me now, and it's making me feel horrible. Harry's one of the few people I would give my life for and the last thing I want to do is have him mad at me -- especially since I might never see him again after the end of the school year. Damn seniors.

*sigh* I need sleep. Goodnight.

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